eighth

I just feel like crap... its me and my big mouth and big ideas again.. i just hate myself when this happens..

*****

backtrack: It was that once when i finally tried to dive into this whole thing. Before then i was happy just looking at bdsm pictures and clips from afar and wondering how it was for real.. and so i tried.. My very first step was to go into a chat room.. Reading through lines and lines of conversation made me want to leave cuz i cant even relate to any of them but i told myself "what the heck, im already here" and i clicked on the very first name my eyes set on... and that was him..
I'd like to think it was meant to be but i dont know maybe its just me and my emotions right now. But i have no regrets meeting him because he's the one who keeps me going...